Category: I Work Out

Walls and Starting Lines: Tough Mudder- Mesa 2015

~ ladyquirky ~ 7 Comments

So, I suppose you wanna hear about my Tough Mudder adventure.

Let me start from the beginning. Did you know there is a wall you have to climb over before the starting line? I do not think it is very tall- 6 or 7 feet maybe. 8? I dunno. Not too high. Most people get over it- and make it look easy.

Now, let me explain- I don’t do heights. I do not climb ladders- I don’t walk to the edge of cliffs- I don’t go anywhere that might require climbing. I am not even fond of stairs. I’m a big girl- not one to let people lift me up or carry me. I just do not do it. EVER! Bridges? No, thank you very much. I am not doing it. Nope. I’ll just go home.

So, here we are. I have spent a small fortune to participate in this event, and I am about to quit before I even get to the starting line. I am in a mass of excited people, and I am filled with dread and regret. I am embarrassed, ashamed, and horrified. I am not doing it.

Tears are streaming down my face, and I am hoping valiantly that no one can see the terror behind my shades. The members of my team are surrounding me, and I cannot hear a word they are saying. All I know is that there is no way in hell I can do this. I feel like a fool for even thinking this is a good idea.

Then… somehow… they convince me to go up to the wall. A pair of hands clasped in front of me- all I have to do is take a step- push up- and take a leap of faith. After a couple of false starts. I am finally able to commit. I step up and grab the edge of the wall. Rick, (who is my burpee nemesis) is straddling the top. He grabs my hand, and I grip his arm. Somehow I get one leg over. I am laying across the top of this wall, shaking with fear. Rick is holding on and telling me how proud he is. And I come over the wall into the arms of my team. Angela is right behind me… up and over the wall. (she makes it look incredibly easy- which makes sense- she is a superhero to me.) Wow. How did we do that? Then, it is time for the National Anthem and the Mudder Pledge. Everything is going to be okay. I am shaking and crying.

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It’s just an obstacle in the end. Do we really want to let obstacles stand in our way?

Then, we jog through the starting line- give a high-five to the dude- and we are off… Now, the adventure is really about to begin. Next up is the Arctic Enema. What? There is a ladder? Ugh. What have I gotten myself into?

 

Meeting my friends for the first time.

~ ladyquirky ~ 2 Comments

The weekend of the Tough Mudder has finally arrived. I have been meaning to sit down all day and write this. (I’ve been busy!!!!)

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This dog won’t stop licking me. And, she does not pose for selfies well.

So, last night around 10PM I am pulling into Albuquerque, which means it is time to stop by and meet Rebecca. Good time to rest, recharge, and get mauled by her sweetie dog, Luna. (It could be Tuna- but, why would you name a dog Tuna?) This is my first encounter with this group of potential axe- murderers. Turns out, it is totally cool and the fact that we have “known” each other on FB for awhile makes it so much easier. I don’t feel the need to be on my best behavior, I am just myself.

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You only take in what you are willing to lose.

So, after a good long rest… I hit the road again. All the caffeine is making it hard to sit still and drive though. Wait, what are those bright lights in the distance? Oh, a Casino. Hmmmm. Don’t mind if I do… Blackjack is not my friend. $60 later…

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Oops. Poor Liz- she is really upset.

Back on the road- (I have been drinking an insane amount of water- I have to stop often.) There is a creepy dude in the car next to me. So, I pull up a space. (There are three rows of parking at this gas station. (It may actually be a truck stop.) Well, now the gas pumps are behind me. I know! I can just do a U-turn. (Hmmm- not one of my brighter ideas.) Poor Liz. I clipped the curb (Why was there a curb in the middle of a parking lot????) Liz is broken. (I called a place- it should not be too much to fix) IMG_7878

Okay- So, now- I love Road Trips. I am jamming along having my own little private car concert- Talking on the phone with the Utah contingent (who are also making the trek overnight.)

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Holbrook. I took a long little break here. Checked FB- Walked around.
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Flagstaff, which is one of my favorite places in the world. I really need to go stay there sometime. I am always just driving through.

Finally, I get to Phoenix. (After the scariest trip through the mountains down I-17.) I learned to drive in Lubbock. (We don’t have all that nonsense.) Start looking for friends. They are at Target. Okay. I will meet you there. (BTW, I pass like 12 Targets on the way to their Target)

When I get there, I am hanging out by the dollar stuff at the front of the store- I hear Sophi! She runs up to me- and says “You look exactly like I knew you looked.” Which is kinda funny, it’s not like this group is pretty much centered around selfies or anything. Rich was there- he and I have a long history of him using voice to text while he is driving all over the midwest. Miranda. It took me a minute. Ahhh.. We watched the Grammy’s “together.”

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So, I just realized- I am up here writing this. That is lame. I need to go experience this trip- instead of just writing about it. SO, to be continued…. There may be more trips to Target scheduled.

 

Letter of Intention: Tough Mudder Arizona

~ ladyquirky ~ 5 Comments
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Ummm. Probably not.

Dear Tough Mudder,

No, not the actual people- this is a letter to the course. In less than one week I will be attempting to complete the challenge of crossing your finish line. 12 miles of mud, obstacles, and friends in the Arizona desert stand between me and success.

I am completely unprepared for the challenge I am certain you will present. Despite this failure on my part to adequately prepare, I am asking you to be kind. (Yes, I know you are the “Toughest OCR”) If I had any sense at all, I would back out. But, my ego and pride demand that I try.

I promise to respect the sanctity of this challenge, and to do my very best. I will face my fears, and try to do every obstacle that I can physically withstand. Furthermore, I promise to be a supportive and excited teammate for my friends who are going on this adventure with me. I will celebrate everyone’s success and encourage them to do their best as well.

I have every intention of laughing and having a good time. I will not give up because I am tired and sore. I will not be a chicken and refuse to let my team help me. It is quite possible that there will be skipping, singing, and dancing through this course. (We have to cope somehow.)

So, if I promise to face this challenge with an open mind and open heart, will you promise to look out for my insanely large group of mudderfied friends? This challenge is a big deal to a lot of us. I really need for no one to get hurt, and for us all to emerge relatively unscathed.

This is so far out of my comfort zone, and I see the opportunity for this to be an important milestone in my life. Next Saturday will be the day that I throw myself whole-heartedly into a task that I find terrifying and intimidating, and have the opportunity to achieve what so many people have said was impossible. Next Saturday will be the day I tell my inner self to get over herself, and allow myself to achieve an insurmountable task. I may as well be climbing Mount Everest. This is just as unlikely for me.

I am going to cross that finish line, no matter what it takes. This will be a huge victory for this girl.

Oh, and I am going to need a ton a photographic evidence. No one is ever going to believe I actually did this.

Sincerely (also excited and scared),

Lady Quirky

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Wait! I did what? No… I don’t usually do things that require a death waiver. I must be possessed.
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At least someone is calling me Princess. I would like to declare that next Saturday, I will officially be Princess Quirky.

 

Tough Mudder Course map… Orange Headband, beer, and friends

~ ladyquirky ~ 3 Comments

OH HOLY HELL. There is obviously something malfunctioning in my brain.E2d3ci-15.03.14 Spectator Map PDF

As I ponder this task, I am left with a sense of awe and wonder. I wonder what on earth ever possessed me to think this is a good idea. Then, I take a deep breath and ask myself “What’s the worst thing that can happen?” Oh, and don’t forget the “death waiver.” I am actually going to sign a death waiver.

Now, some people will do anything for a buck. I am not being paid to do this. I am paying for the pleasure of throwing myself into a giant pit of mud and jumping into a dumpster full of nasty ice water.  (Actually, they have upgraded this obstacle, and it looks way worse now.)

Why would I do this? I don’t actually know anymore. The only thing I am sure of is I have to try. I have to prove to myself that I am not scared to try something new. (thinking knitting might have been a little more my speed… )

I have a suitcase full of gear. I am planning a great week. I am scared and nervous.

I cannot watch anymore videos about these obstacles- or else I am not going.

I am going. Of course I am going. All the girls are going to have a hair braiding party the morning of the Mudder. Then, that night… we are going to have a big party. It is gonna be great. We are a little crazy. IMG_7800

So, here’s to my crazy Mesa Mudsliders team. We are gonna have a blast. We are staying together as a giant group, I am sure people are going to find us obnoxious. There are almost 50 of us. Crazy, I know. It is great though. We have spent the last 6 months or so scheming and planning, worrying and fretting, and sometimes preparing. I am okay with however I do at this. I am going to do the best I can. I am not going to give up, and at the end of the day… I am going to have a drink and toast a successful day. I have nothing to prove to anyone except myself. (Oh, and the people who think I can’t do this.) I have news for everyone- I can do anything I set my mind to- and today… My mind is set on crossing that finish line so I can wear that orange headband and drink a beer with my new friends.

 

Eleven Days!!!!

~ ladyquirky ~ Leave a comment

I only have 11 days until Tough Mudder. I am so excited. I am nervous.

This is gonna be GREAT!!!!

Or possibly a disaster. Either way, it will be an adventure, and something that I will never forget.

Yoga and Shaveanass

~ ladyquirky ~ 29 Comments

Okay, are you sitting down? Also, probably don’t drink anything. It could lead to an epic spit-take. I want you to imagine hell on earth… that’s right, a hot yoga studio.

Let me tell you about my first yoga class. It was at 5:30AM, and Shannon, Steven, and Christi went with me. (I was terrified)- Not sure if you have noticed this trend… I live in a pretty constant state of terror when it comes to new experiences. Yes, I know that sounds weird for someone who gets bored so easily. I should be out seeking new adventures and grabbing for the gusto or whatever that saying is. Too bad that I have a real fear of looking like an idiot, or drawing attention to myself. Okay, whatever, you know what I mean. In real life! Not on the computer. Give me a break. I realize that blogging could be seen by some as a major “LOOK AT ME!” moment. That is not the point! So, back to what I was saying. I had put off hot yoga for something like two years. Ummmm, no. Yoga? hahaha. Nope. Never. Have you Freaking seen me? What on earth makes you think I would enjoy a yoga class?

So, one day in a moment of weakness and peer pressure, Bet ya did not think that peer pressure was still going to be an issue in your mid-thirties; I agreed to go. First things first, I need a yoga mat and a yoga towel. Oh, and don’t you need a new water bottle? So, off to Target. Man, those things are expensive. I am pretty sure I will use it all the time! I am investing in my health! This is really a smart purchase. I only make smart purchases. I never impulse buy. 

So, the next morning I find myself hyperventilating in my car while waiting for my friends to show up to the yoga studio. I had no idea what to expect. Then, here comes Shannon and Steven!!! Yay! Okay, time to get out of the car. You know, you could just start the car real fast and drive off, and pretend this never happened. Oh. They saw me, and they are waving for me to come on already. Deep breath. Okay. You got this.

Once inside, we take off our shoes and head into the dungeon. Holy Crap! It is so hot in here. What on earth is wrong with these people? Okay, just watch and do what whatever Shannon does! Oh, here comes Christi! Come sit by me! Unroll the mat, and spread my magic yoga towel on top. Oh, we need those blocks? Thanks. I wonder what these are for… hmmm this is strange. Why are those people dumping water on their towels? Should I be doing that? No, that seems weird to me. I am not doing that. 

Then, the instructor walked in. Child’s pose. That looks easy. Oh, ouch. ummm that hurts my knee. And where are my boobs supposed to go? I can’t breathe. I am going to suffocate in my own cleavage. Phew. Glad that is over. Time to stand up. Okay, let me see what y’all are doing. Okay right leg forward, bend your knee, do what with my hip? Hold arms out. Hmm. Is this right? Well, close enough. Oh! Now we are going down on the ground. This is like a plank! I can do a plank! Oh, stand up again. Another plank? What the hell? Stand up. Back down. Why are we doing this? 

Oh. I am so thirsty. Why is it so hot in here. Why is that woman still talking? What does she mean breathe? I am drowning in sweat. You want me to turn what towards what? What the hell? I can MODIFY if I want to? Ugh. This is awful? How is that girl doing that? She must be an acrobat. I bet her parents sold her to the circus. Why do people do this? Is this supposed to be relaxing? I’m just going to lay here a minute. Oh. Everyone else is standing up. I hope I don’t grunt when I get up. I really need to pee. I don’t know where the bathroom is. Why is everyone else not dying? How are they doing that? I am not doing that plank thing again. I’ll just stand here and watch. I am dying. This is awful. Quit laughing at me Christi!

And so it went for about an hour. Finally came the end. Time to Shaveanass. Okay, just lay here. My nose itches, I am going to scratch it. Oh, why is my foot tapping. I wonder if my shoes are okay. Do I need a pedicure, let me look. Oh, yeah.Totally need to get the toes done. When is this going to end? Finally!!!

So, this is what I remember from my first yoga class. Shaveanass is courtesy of Tiana’s typo, and it will forever be my favorite part of my practice. (See? I sound all yogi-ish) I have a practice. Not so much. I went like four more times. I have a class paid for, and I really should use it. Maybe Friday.

My First Day Back

~ ladyquirky ~ 2 Comments

So, I have been a total chicken lately. Completely punked out of boxing and going to the gym. Last night was my first night back in close to a month. Boxing is hard enough when you have been working out all the time, your first night back awakens muscles that you completely forgot about. I am so glad that I finally went back.

So, what is it about boxing? Why do I love it?

I love boxing because it is a workout that is deceptively simple. I show up to class and follow directions. (Okay, I try to follow directions, but I still get my left and right confused, and find new combinations insanely difficult. I mean roll-out? Just Duck, Nyki…. what? Why? Why can’t I do this? Oh… you mean duck. Like this? No? What? I can’t do this! Is my turn almost over? You are still expecting me to do this? What? No! I should be at home. Oh!!!! I get it. woo- hoo! I did it! What??? I have to do it again? This is embarrassing. Oops. I messed up. What do you mean, pay attention? GRRRR.) Terry, my coach is a man with infinite patience. He has never let me feel like I cannot do it. He makes me do it until I get whatever it is that he has decided I am going to do. This is good for me. I need the feeling of accomplishment. I get so excited when I finally figure out what he was trying to explain.

I struggle with foot work, and I have very little stamina. 3 minutes (I think it is 3 minutes, it may only be 30 seconds.) is so long! An eternity. Turns out, it takes so much more than just your arms. My right calf takes a beating every single class. I never dreamed that boxing would be a total body workout. It requires balance, and it requires a certain level of mental strength. You push until you think you are actually going to die, and then you keep going.

This workout is good because there are a lot of people in the class who have been doing this for years. (They are so inspiring.) When they see me doing something wrong, (frequently) they are quick to show me a trick to help me understand. It is a wicked workout for everyone. The boxing friends are also so quick to encourage me. It’s like they can sense the moment I feel like giving up, and they give me some support at just the right time. (It could be my loud and incessant complaining and exclamations of I quit, and I can’t do this.)

Despite my awkward disposition, I do best when working out is a social endeavor. I need the support, and I am so glad that I have been welcomed into this class. Seriously. (I am so sore this morning. Advil, please do your job.) I am gaining self confidence, and getting an awesome workout in. I cannot imagine ever hitting another person, however I love hitting the heavy bags. I just wish we could spend more time practicing the whole hugging part of the sport. (THAT seems to be a firm no, however I am not about to stop asking.) My favorite word in the english language may be “TIME!” (signaling the end of torture) but, I also love the phrase he says at the beginning of every class. “Let’s Stretch.” I am so grateful for the opportunity to learn and improve. I think I am going to keep going. Maybe someday I will look strong and capable in those awful pictures and videos he takes. (seriously, I always look like I am dying.)

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Seriously, I think this would go over big in class. He would be so proud! hahaha
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No workout is complete without a least one selfie.
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Owww. My calf was on fire after about 30 seconds.
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I wanted to quit. But, then he pulled out the camera. I hate to look like I am just standing there while he has the camera out. It is embarrassing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So, if you wonder why I love boxing. I love it because it is the most challenging thing I do. I get pushed to limits that I are so much farther than I thought I had. It is the best workout I have ever done. I am not going to give up, and I am not going to miss a month ever again.

*Photos of boxing class shamelessly stolen from my coaches FB. He tagged me, so I am gonna call it fair game. Hope he does not mind.

** I take classes at Right Cross Boxing in Lubbock. Seriously, the best trainer I can imagine.

Turns out- I was Wrong

~ ladyquirky ~ 4 Comments

My health and fitness journey started out on accident. I had tried to jump on the “I love my curves” bandwagon, until I realized- those are not curves. Those are fat rolls. You never see a woman screaming at the top of her lungs- “I love my fat rolls!!!!”- If you ever do see that, just walk away. quickly. They are obviously insane.

Now, this does not mean that I am advocating for women to hate their bodies. However, instead of focusing on what our bodies look like, and their flaws- many women who seem to have a healthy body image- love what their body allows them to DO! These women are my heroes right now. I am currently attempting to train for my Tough Mudder adventure that is happening in… 9 weeks!!!! Gulp. Nine. 9. Nine- one less than 10. Holy Crap on a cracker. What is wrong with me?

And, then… I remembered. I remembered why I wanted to do this in the first place. You see, I “met” all these groovy people on FB in a health club. It was a place where I could post my sweaty gross PWS (post workout selfies) and have people cheer. Yes, it sounds cheesy to want a group of people to cheer for you- but, when you have spent your entire life as an athletic mess, it’s fun to have a cheering squad. These people have encouraged me wholeheartedly. I need that. I tend to divide the world into compartments- there is FB world. Then, there is the Real World. People in the real world don’t want to hear that I lasted 3 whole minutes longer on the treadmill. My fitty buddies get it. They totally get the struggle of trying to drink enough water- How to find protein when you just don’t want to eat more meat… and think your protein powder tastes like sweaty ass. (Quest Bars… although I only like a couple of flavors)

We can discuss sports bras- the horror of being smothered by our breasts when we attempt a Handstand without the sports bra, shin splints, C25K, shoes, compression garments, and for some reason- Zumba. These were the first people who cheered me on when I was new to boxing. They would encourage me to go when I was actually shaking with fear. So, now we are gonna do a TM. WHY????

Well, let me be honest. For some reason- it is a little less scary to be doing this with a group of people who remember that not very long ago- I was excited to walk a mile. They know how much I used to weigh… and if they can do math- they know how much I still weigh. They have seen pics of me trying to find muscles… all in all… they know some of the most private and embarrassing parts of me. The ones I would never discuss with my work friends. And, Angela is going with me. Knowing she will be there is one of the main reasons I know I can do this.

You see, Tough Mudder is often touted as the hardest OCR around. However, if you do some reading- It is really not a race at all. It is all about facing your own personal fears- and reaching out and helping those around you attain their goals. THAT is why I want to do it. I know there are going to be obstacles that I just cannot do. I live in mortal fear of getting stuck in those damn tubes. (I am probably not even going to attempt those. My dreams were too vivid. My poor soul cannot imagine surviving that.)

So, once again- why? Why would a fat, scared girl want to go roll around in the mud with a bunch of fitty fools? They have given me hope. Hope that I can change. Hope that if I keep working- I can be better. Healthier. Stronger. I have never been an athlete. I want to be able to call myself one.

I do not trust people who say they are okay with being fat and unhealthy. It makes me nervous. There is a sense of complacency that surrounds that statement. Now, there was a time- when I was all eating disordered and tired. I did not ever imagine being able to be thin without spending half my life in a bathroom with my fingers stuck down my throat. So, in order to stop that behavior- I stopped weighing myself. I did not get healthy- I just stopped thinking about it. I told myself I did not want to go hike up that sand dune to see the living coral or whatever. That was a lie!!!! I did want to see it- I was just too scared of trying and failing once again.

I had to stop saying I want to be thin!!! Now, I believe that will most likely be a byproduct of eating well and exercising. I do not really have a goal weight. I have a desire to be active. I secretly want to become a runner. I want to earn medals for running a marathon. I want to make it through a boxing class without someone having to steadily encourage me to keep moving. I want to be able to take a dance class without everyone being afraid that I am going to die. I want to be able to go to hot yoga- and not be afraid that I look like a beached walrus.

You know, getting fitty for fat folk is a pride swallowing endeavor. It is frightening. I am  embarrassed  to really work hard- because I am afraid people are going to assume all my panting and sweating are a byproduct of my fat ass moving. I automatically assume that people are watching and judging me. (For the most part, this has not happened. I have had nothing but encouragement- except for one asshat that laughed at my TM goal.) There are some things I am pretty good at. There are lots of things that scare the crap out of me. I have one bad knee- and I live in constant fear of having to use crutches again. I started out wearing big baggy clothes to the gym. Then, I realized that compression gear- made working out so much more comfortable. So, now I wear form-fitting gear- and fuck em if they don’t like it.

I am fat. I am working pretty hard to change it. I have good weeks and bad weeks. I still struggle with the whole thing frequently. I get nervous when people point out that they can tell I am losing weight. The most important thing for me- is I am trying. I am trying to be healthy. I am trying to get stronger. You, see… I was wrong. I don’t want to be thin. I am never going to be 5’8 and a blonde bombshell. I am going to be me. I am pretty fucking fantastic. I am okay with that. And, when I earn my orange headband… I am going to celebrate it. So, with the help of both new and old friends- I totally got this.

The Accidental Boxer

~ ladyquirky ~ Leave a comment

So, I was conned into starting a blog by my best friend (aka: my person), Angela. She is also part of the reason I am mucking my way through this new lifestyle. Maybe I should tell you a little about me first.

I am a 34-year-old single mother. No- I have never been married. My son is 15 and he is my favorite person in the entire world. I am a Nurse Practitioner, and I am ecstatic to be working with the group that employs me. I have been overweight for years. I was never an athlete- sure wanted to be though. A few months ago I joined this group on Facebook- it is a group of people who are just trying to be healthy- and they post about their health journey. I was not that impressed at first- but, I kept watching these posts go by on my newsfeed. Then, one day on my way to lunch, I decided to stop at Planet Fitness. No, I did not want a tour. Just sign me up- hurry! This place was creeping me out! The next morning I got up early and went. That was the beginning. After about 3 weeks a friend of mine asked me to go to her boxing class. I told her I was not sure I was ready- just because I had only lost 14 pounds and everything was still so hard!!!

Kimberli took this pic after class. I can't believe I was trying to box in that shirt!
Kimberli took this pic after class. I can’t believe I was trying to box in that shirt!

Here’s the news- I WENT! I was convinced I was going to die- and I was BAD! I could not figure out how to stand- let alone throw a punch. I was wearing multiple layers of clothes… and I just knew I did not belong there. But- three things happened. 1. Kimberli took some pics of me after class, 2. She told me to keep the boxing gloves she had loaned me because I would need them when I came back, and 3. I posted those pics on the group page and everyone was so excited and supportive. So, I went on Monday and signed up. Have not looked back since.  Heck- the second class I even took off my long- sleeved shirt and wore a tank.

These days I go to class 3-4 times a week. I am getting stronger, and more importantly, my self- confidence is growing. I wear dresses now. I have a few muscles that you can see if you squint your eyes really hard. The most important change has been in my mentality. My goal is no longer to weigh a certain number or to be a certain size. My goals center around making my body strong and healthy so that I can do more with it. I was tired of sitting on the sidelines of life because I was too fat to participate. I want to go on adventures.

So, I have made a decision. I am going to keep boxing- duh! I am also going to start training for a Tough Mudder. Holy Crap!