If I Had A Million Dollars

Honestly, right now I am feeling like Dr. Evil. Remember that highly active imagination I have? Well, one of my favorite fantasies is… What if I were RICH? Now, the fantasy is not to be well- off or just comfortable. No, I mean is, what amount of money would make money no longer an issue? What if I could do ANYTHING at any time? So, I sometimes ponder- how much money would I need? A million dollars probably would not cut it in my fantasy- but, I like the number. So, just multiply by some other number that would leave me filthy rich.

Hmmm. Fun. What would I do? What kind of person would I be? Would I flit around the world with a private jet? Going from one island to another? Party in Paris? Would I have a job? Would I still have the job I have now? I say now, with all earnestness I might add, of course I would keep my job. A girl’s gotta work. However, if I could do anything… would I really? Probably not. Let’s be honest. If I could do anything, I would seek to make a difference in as many different areas as possible. I would donate money to charities. I would start a foundation. I would help someone!!!! I am pretty sure that most people say that.

Can I focus on the shallow stuff for a minute?

First of all, I would help my family. I would make sure that everyone had a home they loved. I would make sure that those four little boys in my life had their educations paid for. I would make sure that they had a little something for the future. I would ensure that my Mom and Don, and grandparents had whatever they needed for the rest of their lives. I picture buying some land and building homes where all my people were in one spot. (Now, I would not live there. I would just want them readily available. I am kidding. kind of.) Kind of like a little utopia filled with all the people I love. Can you imagine a little village for my tribe? Wouldn’t that be fun? I would give them every comfort and luxury they could imagine. I am sure my family is shuddering at the thought of my personal little prison filled with gadgets. Can you imagine someone trying to dictate where you live, and how you spend your time? (Well, this is my selfish fantasy.) Wow, how quickly it turns from doing something for them, to do something for me. Interesting how that works.

You see, I have an issue with wanting to “fix” things. I do not like it when my people are struggling. In my fantasy, money fixes all. (Now, obviously money cannot buy happiness,) but, it sure can buy a lot of toys. Who doesn’t like toys?

Okay, now remember, money is no issue. This means that I am going to have to have my friends available for adventures all the time. I guess they had better have their own neighborhood in my little village. Oh, you have a career? No worries. I’ll take care of you. I need people to play with. (Now, my friends are all perfectly capable of taking care of themselves, but- I cannot let their jobs interfere with our adventures.) Oh, they have their own plans for their own adventures? Well, too bad, this is my fantasy.

Wow, all this money has made me selfish. WHAT? I am giving people everything!!! This is decidedly unfair.

Hmmm. Maybe instead of “caring” for all the people I love, I should focus more on philanthropy. What causes would speak to my heart most of all? Probably education. I would help people who really wanted to get an education, and I would try to get them whatever support they needed to reach their full potential. (You know, that may not require all that much money- support does not always have to be financial. That’s a thought I should ponder more later.)

You see, there is really no amount of money that would make money not an issue. Even the most benevolent people would struggle with not tying strings (okay, may nooses) to their gifts. When you start giving people money, it is human nature to try to tell people how to spend it, and how they should live- after all, you gave them money. THEY OWE YOU. Does this mean that you own them? Exactly what do they owe you? LOYALTY? Yikes. Maybe all this money is making me an evil dictator. But, they have a pool. I am pretty sure they are happy. Yeah, I would be happy.

Okay, well I guess if we have figured out anything at all, it is that I probably don’t need to end up with an endless supply of money. It would probably not be a good idea for me to enslave all the people I love. damn, that makes me a little sad.

*Now, mostly this is a joke. Not entirely of course. It would be totally cool to have a little village where everyone I love always had all of their material needs met. But, that is really not realistic.

**If anyone finds themselves with a large sum of cash they need to dispose of- there is a nice little charity called the “Nyki really wants a Porsche Fund” and, it is always taking donations. (The fund manager is still waiting anxiously for the first deposit.)

***Seriously, I would totally donate lots of money. I’m a giver.

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